MemberSeptember 29, 2020 at 4:15 pm
IWRT! As I am a new writer myself and not confident giving you any specific rewrite notes, I will only say this: my sense of the blurb was that it gave too much information so yes, I agree with the feedback you’ve received about ways to trim it. But the world you are creating sounds like one I would enjoy escaping to.
I would also like to ask if you know any twins yourself? My father was an identical twin and the bond he had with his brother was DEEP. The idea that one would be drawn by evil and the other by good, well, that is a great set-up for conflict because I tell you, no matter what happened in life, my dad and uncle loved each other unconditionally. How might a love like that be expressed when they head in different directions? Would it pull them back to one another? Would it devastate should one fully reject the other? What would it take to sever such a bond? Or repair it?
Just some things to consider. Look forward to watching your progress!