MemberOctober 7, 2020 at 9:36 am
Thanks Adam. Lots of good advice there, especially to refocus by opening with the anomalies rather than the breakfast/go to work scene. I’d been planning to ground the real world bits and then slowly sprinkle in weirdness, but since the first page has to be grabby, it does seem like a good idea to focus on weirdness THEN the everyday life stuff.
(The Dark Lord – maybe I’ll think of a different name for them. The idea in the setting is that the epic battle between good and evil occurred centuries ago, and all of the ruins are now commercial tourist attractions and so forth. Thanks for the clip; I had a laugh.)
The clashing feedback is great; that indicates something isn’t working. I’ll think on this before the second round…