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MemberSeptember 23, 2020 at 4:56 am
Hi Sandra. Fantasy is always hard to set up in hooks or blurbs because of the detailed world-building and reader on-boarding required. I think this reads more as a blurb than a punchy book hook (which I understand to be a short soundbyte to grab a reader’s or agent’s attention). It sounds like Thera is scared of change – changes in her boyfriend, changes by the rogue adventure (what was that about?)
Maybe fear of change is the throughline here?
Also, I’m not fond of ending blurbs on questions, as I always assume the protag will pull through.
Further, you’ve got concepts and names in there that don’t need to be
explained, as this is just your book hook, rather than a blurb or
A young noblewoman struggles to adapt when her comfortable life is threatened by magical changes; with her lover’s change of personality after bonding to a wolf, and within herself as her own magic becomes tainted by darkness.
That’s not ideal, but it’s what I was thinking of when I tried to reduce your paragraph to a few short sentences. Hope this helps.