Thank you, Rose. It’s very helpful to know where a reader gets bumped out of the story.
Tom Cat is the mirror opposite of the character that the MC (Declan) knows in the set-up (the Save the Cat-ese set-up*). Jim is a follow-the-rules kinda guy. And I think I — ‘er the bad guy — just blew him up today. Whereas, Tom Cat follows the rules just enough to stay out of trouble, but he facilitates Declan learning what he needs to know to take action.
I did introduce Jim in a draft of the blurb, but it cost more words than I think it helped to create the interest/intensity of the story.
*I’m using the Save the Cat (screenwriter’s version) as a guide to help me assemble my story. I’m not religious about it, but I find it really helps when I’m adrift.
