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    aaron brooks

    Member
    September 7, 2020 at 5:56 am

    Great job on the rewrite of the blurb/synopsis, Lauren.

    If I can add — I think you should give a little more setting/context. I want to know what Nia Fisher does. If she’s female John Wick, that mean she’s an assassin, or retired assassin, right? And is Rhys also an hired killer? I’m assuming so, but it doesn’t say here…

    So could it be something like: When assassin turned housewife Nia Fisher finds her best friend and mentor dead in his office she decides to come out of retirement and seek revenge. But in order to catch up with the killers she must go somewhere she vowed never to go again. Through a portal into the magical realm called The Vanguard– where Sellswords and assassins hide around every corner….yada yada Etc.

    Just want it to be clear what Nia does for a living (assuming assassin) and if she is retired, does she have a family now? Leaving her family to go through a portal and get revenge could add stakes…

    Also, who is Dru Church? if we’re in a fantasy world, I’m guessing he’s magical too? Like The Man in Black from The Gunslinger…? Tease me with what make Church a formidable bad guy…

    But yeah — I dig the pitch. J Wick meet Chronicles. It evokes images and expectations, so I want to make sure you live up to the promise of your premise.

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